About me

For the last 30 years I have worked in roles that involve developing people. Teaching, managing, advising, coaching, training, counselling and therapy.

Fifteen years ago I chose to specialise in relationship issues as I believe that it is contentment with our relationships that is the key to wider happiness in our lives. Everything else can be going well, but if our intimate relationships with partner, family or friends are not working as we’d like, this becomes a thorn in our side that spreads to make an otherwise productive life simply miserable.

Initially trained (1999) using an integrative approach to counselling, I followed this with coaching, NLP, personality theory (MBTI), and a specialised 2 ½ year training as a systemic/psychodynamic relationship therapist. I have added 2 years training in mindfulness based cognitive therapy, and choose to specialise in running classes for couples in compassion based therapy for my thesis. Most recently I have completed the Couples Institute Training in the Developmental Model for couples work.

Using these frameworks, I help you to regain your appreciation for your strengths and differences. Rebalancing the internal conflicts which are causing you to be stuck, and working with you to find new ways of doing things. The focus in the sessions is on moving forward, only looking back into the past as a way of understanding and dismantling the blocks that are preventing you from having a strong relationship.

I integrate both counselling and coaching models to ensure a forward focus. Knowing what went ‘wrong’ can be helpful in knowing how you got to now, but moving forward to a different future is usually what people are most interested in, and a coaching approach tends to be most helpful in enabling you to make this happen!

My role is to help you reconnect to the joy that you once found in each other. Enabling the conversations you have been avoiding as they are too difficult or end in arguments. I provide a safe neutral space where you can discuss the issues that are impacting on your ability to appreciate each other. Figuring out what went wrong, so you don’t have to go through it again.

In the past I have worked through counselling centres such as Relate in Edinburgh and Exeter, and also through a local GP practice. At present I work only in private practice and work from an office at my home at the seaside in the Edinburgh suburb of Portobello. From here I see clients both face to face and online. This ensures both confidentiality and flexibility.

Each person, each couple is different, and do not believe a one size fits all approach is appropriate. I offer a warm, empathic, person centred approach. Starting where you are, we move forward from there!

Jane Wilkin